70 pages • 2 hours read
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Adam Ross is the protagonist and narrator of this novel. Adam is a high school sophomore diagnosed with OCD, and he attends therapy and a support group to manage his disorder. Adam desperately wants to be a normal teenage boy, but he struggles with compulsions and other mental health issues, including counting in his head, tapping patterns to stay calm, and completing cleansing rituals before entering through new doors. Many of his compulsions stem from the stress and anxiety related to his mother’s mental health issues and the consequently unsafe living environment in their home.
As an older brother to Sweetie, a son to his parents and his stepmom Brenda, and a friend to Ben Stones, Robyn, and his support group, Adam puts a lot of pressure on himself to protect his loved ones. He is there for Sweetie when he’s scared, hurt, or tired, and he’s there for his friends to confide in. Sometimes it is difficult for Adam to see how much he tries to give to others and how much energy it takes from him. However, the emotional toll is significant: His belief that he’s at fault for every bad thing that happens to his friends and family, and that he must complete his rituals perfectly to ensure their safety, is a manifestation of his OCD.